Up Close and Personal with The Dynamic Duo
Some folks enjoy meeting the people behind the scenes of Ambrosia, some are curious about what goes into a new program, and some are just plain nosy. So each issue of The Ambrosia Times we interview a member of the Ambrosia family.
Ambrosia Times - Hark! What is that noise on the
roof?!?
Dynamic Duo -It's your mom wearing a very bad
suit...
AT - What? What's that supposed to mean? Oh,
nevermind. So the rumors are true. The Dynamic
Duo of Ambrosia Software truly do exist! What
brings you here?
DD - The same thing that brings us here every day,
we're trying to take over the software world...
AT - So Aaron the Atom, or should I call you
"Double-A" for short? How did you get into the
superhero business?
Aaron the Atom - Well, the radio business wasn't
paying well, and there were babes to save, you figure it out...
AT - And Terrible Tom, being 8'2" 420 pounds, do you have problems finding a tailor?
Terrible Tom - Actually, I just waddle on over to the local camping store and use the tarps and oversized ponchos. Yeah, there are a few people that look at me a little funny, but then I just crush them with my fists of death.
AT - When not fighting crime or keeping the streets safe from the killer rabbits, what do you guys do in your spare time?
AA - Most of the time we walk through the forest, pick up the field mice and bop them on the head...
AT - Well, hobbies are good. Mr. Atom, I understand that you can move at the speed of an atom. Does this fact make you edgy when sitting in line at the drive-thru?
AA - Are you kidding, at that speed, I go in and help myself, leaving money on the counter of course. Hey, do you want an extra Beenie Baby?
AT - Um, no thanks. And Mr. Terrible, being so big and strong, have you considered a career in the NFL?
TT - I was actually asked to join the Cowboys a while back, but the scouts saw that I have not committed a crime, so they dropped me.
AT - Is that so? Do you guys have a signal or something? Batman has that spotlight, do you have something like that? Are you hooked up through 911 or something?
AA - Hey man, get with the times, you can email us, page us, or give us a buzz on the Dynamic Cell Phone.
AT - What's the most dangerous adventure you two have been on?
AA - Without getting into too much of the gruesome details, we have at times had to rescue Captain Hector from the slobbering jowls of The Mighty Ulff.
AT - I can see the advantages of Aaron the Atom's speed, and Terrible Tom's strength, it's a great combination. But who's the brains of the operation?
DD - That's real simple, I am.
AT - You both are?!? Hmm... OK. Mr. Terrible, is it true that you get all of your energy from oatmeal creme cookie-sandwiches? If so, is this all you eat?
TT - A major portion of my energy is supplied by these wonderful little cookies. However, in order to unlock that super power locked inside each cookie, I am required to consume whipped pickled herrings before I eat them, lest the potential power be wasted.
AT - Gotcha. And Mr. Atom, we all know you eat the country's nuclear waste for breakfast, but is this your only source of energy? Rumor has it that you've been seen sneaking a piece of lasagna. Care to comment?
AA - No.
AT - OK. Um. Without giving away too much, how do you two mesh with society? Are either of you "mild mannered reporters?"
AA - We take to society like legos to construx.
TT - In fact, I have an underground bunker filled with C-4. But I won't tell you what it's for yet. Ha ha ha!
AT - Right, uh - moving on, we all know that "The Great Big Head of Cheese" is your most notorious rival, but do you have any other enemies that the world should be aware of?
AA - We really don't feel comfortable talking about that since we don't know who may read this. We would hate to appear vulnerable before all our fans. It just isn't cool.
TT - Well, I'll just say that those Olson Twins had better watch their backs, 'cause as soon as Uncle Jessie turns his back, POW!
AT - Do you guys ever hang out with other superheros? Have you ever met "The Tick?" What's he like?
AA - We consider ourselves above the other superheroes since we are actually flesh and blood. I had a tick in my neck once, but I think that was after a long day here.
AT - Well, we'd like to thank Aaron the Atom and Terrible Tom for coming by today to talk with us. It is a comfort to know that you guys are there protecting against evil. Anything else either of you would like to say?
DD - You know, after all the protection we have given the individuals here, you'd think they would start paying us...
AT - I thought you were compensated out of our federal taxes. You don't see any of it? Well, here's five bucks, and thanks again for all of the service to society.