by Ambrosia Software Users
This section features reader responses to Ambrosia’s software & service. We will include the good with the bad, and address any problems brought to our attention. These are real people, writing real letters about real issues. Feel free to drop us a line.
>>> “Thanks for [expletive deleted] up my life and making everything take a back burner to this infernal obsession [Apeiron]. I won’t download Swoop...I won’t download Swoop. Oh WTF? One little looksie couldn’t make things worse...”
Sanjay Agrawala, Illinois
— Sorry Apeiron has reorganized your priorities a bit. You never really liked that job anyway, and a stable family life is really overrated. Wait until you taste a little bit of the thunder from down under.
>>> “About Apeiron: it really is what was promised. Steam evaporating from my skull, loose buttons on my keyboard, terrible pain in my back and elbow...still can’t resist.”
Mika Syrén, Finland
— Holy product liability cases Batman! Not since the Pinto has a company experienced such a backlash. Most folks lament about the emotional and social problems attributed to Apeiron. You’re one of the first on the physical front. Maybe we should introduce a new line of safety equipment for our products, sort of digital bicycle helmets. Polarized sunglasses, wrist supports, and a back brace to start I guess.
>>> “Cool game! I’d love to be able to pause the game, though...”
Micki Bessler, Oregon
— Actually, there’s a pause function already built in, although it isn’t documented in Apeiron’s instructions. Your Caps Lock key will pause the game (Swoop, Maelstrom, & Chiral as well) and give you access to your menu bar. This is just sort of second nature for us, and we forgot to clue in the rest of the world. Oops, sorry.
Working the other way, if your game starts up “frozen” with “Pause” written across the screen, your Caps Lock key is depressed and you are in pause mode.
>>> “What is the latest version of ColorSwitch, and is there a PowerPC version?”
Unidentified Caller
—The latest version of ColorSwitch is 2.3.0. See the product list in the back of this issue for the latest version of all of our products. Right now, your PowerMac still uses many toolbox routines that are not in native code. Some of these routines are what ColorSwitch uses to do what it does so smoothly. So since these toolbox routines aren’t native, it makes little sense for ColorSwitch to be native. The program would actually slow down due to emulation switching.
>>> “What is the current high score for Apeiron?”
Multiple Users
— This number is soooo big that we can only fit it in one place in the newsletter. See the Apeiron High Score contest chapter. Click on the Go To icon below and You’ll be taken right there.
>>> “Thank you for making joy”
Takashi Ishiguro, Japan
— Thank you. It really is a good feeling knowing how much our customers appreciate us. It makes up for the occasional rotten apple.